sitonmyinterface | Entries tagged with family

So my boyfriend dropped a mini bomb the other night by saying that he might want to have a kid someday, after all. I have always been Ms. No-Kids McGee, and he has to realize I am 37 going on an improbable age to be a mother. I have a whole list of fears associated with pregnancy, giving birth, and having a child. It's the rest of your life; your child becomes your life.

Pregnancy Fears	Birthing Fears	Aftermath Fears
Preeclampsia	Ruined vagina	Sickness/death
Gestational diabetes	Incontinence	Being bullied
Morning sickness	The pain	Becoming an asshole, criminal, or drug addict
Hemorrhoids	Needing a C section	Worrying for the rest of my life
Bed rest confinement	A bunch of bloodwork	Bringing someone into a shit world
Going off my psych meds	Dying (myself, the baby, or both)	Not having help with baby things
Going off BC pills (hormones)	Hospital anxiety	Abused or raped by a stranger
Anal prolapse	Deformities or down syndrome	Their future pain

So that's that... I could honestly make this list so much larger but trying not to get lost in it.

Current Mood: contemplative

Haven't seen my father in about 2 years, and trying to coordinate with my brother on getting up there is like pulling fucking teeth. He wants to leave in the late afternoon on Friday, which sucks because dad likes us to get up there as early as possible so he has more time to spend with us. I can't drive this year due to the unreliability of my car, so I can't put my foot down :(

My dad will be upset. My brother wants to "chill" before we go, he wants to "relax a little". I tell him it's the least we can do to make him a little happy after not seeing him for so long. He comes back with "I'll leave at 6 if I want!" He doesn't even work full time and will have all of thanksgiving to chill because we don't have plans this year. My mom, who usually orchestrates Thanksgiving was invited to her cousin's place so we're free.

As a side note, really dreading Christmas time, because I don't have the monies for gifts. Shitty there has to be a feeling of dread, but this commercial holiday breeds this shit.

Current Mood: frustrated

It's so quiet right now. That's the great thing about coming in early on occasion. Not a peep will happen until about 8am. My workplace is never devoid of sound or vox-boxes. I should honestly salt the fuck out of this room, I'm surprised there isn't a poltergeist running amok from all the negative energy up in here.

Speaking of boxes, I need to arrange to get some from Barnes&Noble. Since working there YEARS ago, I've always maintained my box connect! I'm moving at the end of July and things are still up in the air. This should get interesting. I have to remind myself that the sky will not fall, and the Earth will not disappear out from under me, no matter what happens. I emailed the only rental community I could find to elaborate on their pet policy. Again, it's like pulling teeth to find landlords that will accept two LABS.

My brother has suggested I come to Maine sometime in November with his father. My mom would instantly feel left out. I bet if I said I was going alone, she would want to come with me again. Not that it was shitty at all, but when I scheduled it before she hijacked that shit! The vibe would be less stressful for my brother, but what can you do? That's up to him to work on. Besides, I would feel awkward traveling with his father all by myself. We don't have 1-on-1 time at all, and never have.

I just came across this on reddit. This is apparently honey from bees that have collected sugars from the dumpster of an M&M factory. What a lovely addition :/